"Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too was a gift." - Mary Oliver
Every once in awhile, maybe more often than I believe, a wave of self-reflection sweeps over me. Thinking on my faults, my misdeeds, and my fears. And in that, I seek to blame others, especially persons I trusted most, for what I perceive to be the negative parts of me.
It is time for a new way of thinking, especially if I plan to teach young minds. Time for a sense of my own responsibility and perhaps gratefulness.
As cliché as it may be, I need and want to be a light. I would rather my gift be light than "a box full of darkness," even though those boxes are issues I continue to sort through over the years. But maybe those boxes were not meant to create negative parts of me but gifts meant to strengthen me. And I think it is up to me still to decide.
I know what you mean about wanting to be a "light" despite the cliché. Mary Oliver always articulates such self-reflective thoughts so very well. xo
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